What women DONT want!

Today my partner gave me a gift of sorts and I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. We were discussing possible plans for Valentines Day (yes it’s weeks away but you know what say about the early bird!) and suddenly he produces a voucher cut out from the Sun newspaper. It’s for 50% off at Butlins.

My first reaction is “You read the Sun?!!” and my second is “BUTLINS?!”. For those outside the UK, the Sun newspaper is the one with the page 3 boobs, and Butlins is an incredibly depressing holiday resort chain that parents drag their children to for rainy boring British summer holidays.

Now i’m not going to say that would be the reaction of all women, but the majority would agree that giving us a gift that is in fact proof that you prefer the breast-newspaper over the Times is no better than getting us a Vacuum Cleaner for Christmas. Which by the way is a really bad idea.

I remember the year when an ex actually gave me a new toaster for Christmas. Or the one before that who thought a £15 gift voucher would be a good idea for Valentines Day. I guess there’s a reason they’re Ex’s.

Surely by now, after all these years of evolution, men should have caught on to what’s an acceptable V-Day gift and what isn’t. Stick to the classics unless you’re absolutely positive that your other half really wants those LED undies.

I’m not writing this blog in the hopes that my current love will read this and take note. Honest.

Happy Early Valentines!